(A dream about becoming a true Black Irishman)
by H. Millard © 2005

On his December 21, TV show, talker Bill O'Reilly gave his audience his usual dose of predictable PC outrage over whites wanting to remain white when he said that April Gaede, the mother of Lamb and Lynx Gaede--Prussian Blue, should be charged with child abuse. Why? Well this came after a guest on the show named Bernard Goldberg indicated that he's added the twins to his list of people who are screwing up America.

By anyone's standards, screwing up America is quite an achievement for forty year olds and it's very remarkable for thirteen year olds. In fact, one can't usually screw up a nation very much until one is much, much older, and even then one must have some sort of major influence or power. Oh, you know, like being President Bush and starting a meaningless war, or something like that. Well, of course, you'd never hear neocons, or whatever they are, like O'Reilly and Goldberg, say that about Bush. Never mind. You probably already knew that.

Goldberg told O'Reilly that the twins sing and dance and have a "big following among neo-Nazis and white supremacists." Ho hum. Bad twins. Bad non-Jewish White people who know they're White people.

Did O'Reilly jump in and defend free speech? Nope. Did he ask Goldberg about any biases that Goldberg might have? Nope. So, what's a good Irish Catholic boy like O'Reilly doing knocking his own people? His own people? Ahhh. Naturally, you're most likely thinking, as am I, that O'Reilly probably doesn't have the consciousness to know that the Gaede twins are his people at all. Didn't he demonstrate that when he got upset months ago because some Whites held their own Whites only prom? Bad Whites. Hey, we all bleed red blood. Of course, as far as I know, O'Reilly hasn't let out a peep about Blacks only proms, Latinos only proms, American Indians only proms, and whatever only proms. You've got me on his silence. Maybe he feels those things are signs of ethnic pride. Good non-Whites. However, my better guess may be that if O'Reilly did weigh in on these ethnic proms, he'd take the aracial blender line and say that everyone should be lumped together--not only before the law, as is right--but also in intimate social situations and rites of passage that lead to life choices about mating and marriage.

O'Reilly, and those like him, if I've got him and them pegged right, may be people without a people. Maybe I have it wrong, but to me O'Reilly sounds as though he thinks he's part of that bland undifferentiated mass of human protoplasm that the blenders want to create and which they falsely claim already exists in order to convince people to blend themselves away. Why, this little vacuole over here is just the same as this one over there, and this pseudopod is the same as this other one.

Tell me where I'm wrong on this. O'Reilly, if we are to judge from his public pronouncements on race, seems to either not understand much about genes and genotypes, or perhaps he just wants to deny their reality. Could he actually think he's reached the pinnacle of his profession all on his own and that his genes had nothing to do with his success?

The truth is that everyone who is a success in life--whether it's in business or sports or any other field--should be humbly bowing down to the ancestors who have given them the genes to become what they've become. Without the genes, they wouldn't be where they are. And, they didn't get those genes on their own. They inherited them. They got them just by being born. Their ancestors mated right and they are the result. Wrong genes and your legs aren't as fast. Wrong genes and your mind isn't as sharp. Wrong genes and your face isn't so beautiful. It's all about genes. Of course, if you don't do something with what you have, or if luck doesn't smile on you...but, that's a different story.

Anyway, as I sat there on December 21, near to Christmas, mind you, watching O'Reilly knock Prussian Blue, I fell asleep. In my dream, I decided to show O'Reilly what the world would be like if just three "minor" changes had been made in his family line. I dreamed that my name was Clarence Oddbody, Angel Second Class. Then, in my dream, I took O'Reilly with me back to Ireland during the Irish Potato Famine and made him invisible so he could watch everything unfold without being seen. In the blink of an eye, I merged with my own great grandfather and I was soon standing next to the earlier O'Reilly on a ship to America. There we were, two Irishmen traveling in steerage with all the other Irish to a land where we hoped we wouldn't starve.

Nice guy, the earlier O'Reilly. Had the gift of gab, a twinkle in his eye, and an easy and friendly way about him. He was also very white. No surprise in that. He was Irish. The Irish are a white people. Never fear, I had a plan to get the white out. I used my Angelic powers to hypnotize the earlier O'Reilly and I planted some suggestions deep in his mind that he was supposed to marry a black woman when he got to America.

Sure enough, this first O'Reilly to come to America married a Black woman. One of the children they had was O'Reilly's grandfather. By the simple law of genetics, he was half Black and Half white. Then, when the kid was of marrying age, I entered the scene again and hypnotized him, as I had his father, and told him that he should also marry a Black woman. He did so, and he had a male child. This child was more Black than White. In my dream, this was O'Reilly's father. I did the same thing again with O'Reilly's father and he also married a Black woman. They had a boy named Bill O'Reilly. He didn't look anything like the present Bill O'Reilly that we're familiar with on Fox News.

I then showed the White Bill O'Reilly the Fox News Channel after I had made the changes. It was still December 21. Now, there was no O'Reilly on Fox. Sean Hannity was still there, however, and I made a mental note to give him and his family the Clarence treatment next Christmas if he said anything stupid about race or genes. I figured that would be soon.

Anyway, I made the White Bill O'Reilly visible again and took him to see the Black Bill O'Reilly. We arrived at a store in Harlem with a sign that read: "Bill O'Reilly's Liquor" We went in and bought a couple of bottles of booze from the middle aged Black guy behind the counter. "You Bill O'Reilly?" I asked?

"That's me," said the Black guy in a friendly tone of voice. "What can I do you for?"

"Oh nothing, the booze is enough, thanks. Nice store. Name sounds Irish."

"Yeah, they say my great grandfather came from Ireland. Sort of puts a new twist to Black Irish, I always say."

"Yeah," I agreed. "Makes you wonder about what might have been, doesn't it?

"What do you mean?"

"Well, about the human condition. About marriage. About birth. About who we are. Why we are who we are. What is essential to our existence. Family. You know, all those sorts of questions."

"Yeah," came the reply. "Well, I figure I'm just who I should be. It's destiny. How 'bout you?"

"Yeah, I'm just who I should be too," I replied, as the White O'Reilly and I left the store.

"So," said the White O'Reilly, "what's all this supposed to mean? The guy in the liquor store seemed nice. Were you trying to show me that I would somehow be a bad person if things had gone differently? If that's what you were trying to do, you failed."

"The Black O'Reilly does seem to be a nice guy," I said. "But, that's not the point. This isn't about the relative worth of this or that human being and I'm making no such judgments. The point is that he's not you and he's not really the present manifestation of your ancestors in your line as you are. He's a branching in a totally different direction. He doesn't look much like your great grandfather, but you do. Your family's genes have been washed out of him. And, what caused the branching? Just three marriages that were different in your line. The Black Bill O'Reilly is you with a different great grandmother, a different grandmother, and a different mother. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with that alternate Bill O'Reilly, he's just not you. He's Irish in name only, not in his genotype.

"If you want, I can make what you saw tonight the reality. What say you, Bill O'Reilly? Do you want to remain as you are or do you want to be the alternate Bill O'Reilly? Which you is the real Bill O'Reilly? Which you could go back to Ireland and be recognized as an O'Reilly? Which you is made to the original specs in the original blueprint that is carried within our cells?"

#  #  #


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Ourselves Alone & Homeless Jack's Religion  

Ourselves Alone & Homeless Jack's Religion
messages of ennui and meaning in post-american america by H. Millard

In Ourselves Alone and Homeless Jack's Religion, H. Millard, the hard to pigeonhole author of The Outsider and Roaming the Wastelands, has put together some of his category bending commentaries on post-American America. The commentaries deal with politics, philosophy, free speech, genocide, religion and other topics in Millard's edgy style and lead up to Homeless Jack's Religion, in which Homeless Jack lays out revelations he found in a dumpster on skid row. Browse Before You Buy ISBN: 0-595-32646-3

Roaming the Wastelands  

- (ISBN: 0-595-22811-9)
H. Millard’s latest sacred cow toppling book, is now
available at by clicking on this link

or by calling 1-877-823-9235.

“A fun–and sobering–thing to read” - Alamance Independent

The Outsider  

THE OUTSIDER - (ISBN: 0-595-19424-9)
H. Millard’s underground classic story of alienation is
available at by clicking on the this link
 or by calling 1-877-823-9235:

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